Life is the most awesome yet most mind boggling this ever. In one moment I go through so many feelings – some good, some bad. There is immense pressure to deliver at work, and then in your social circle, and then at home – with family and loved ones. Everywhere you go there’s expectations and sometimes they’re overwhelming. Life is awesome, but life is also hard. Sometimes, I find, that getting lost in happy thoughts, and quotes like these, makes the hard days easier to get through!
Here’s to trying to be a more regular blogger this year! At least on the weekdays. Weekends are a time to laze and lounge around! Boy, am I glad it’s Friday. May you all have a wonderful weekend, spend much time under the duvet, possibly with someone lovely – even just a pet. God knows my three cats love to snuggle up to me when I’m trying to snooze…
Hello 2016! What an eventful year we bid farewell to. Here’s to hoping that this one is just as fun, frivolous and bursting with love, laughter, health, happiness and everything in between.
Today I bring you just one quote to embark on this new journey spanning 365 days :)
“Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers, you cannot be successful or happy.” – Norman Vincent Peale
Sometimes I feel like I’m not made for this world. As C. S. Lewis said, “If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy the only logical explanation is that I was made for another world…” Nothing could sum my feelings up more perfectly today. I’m not generally a family person. Hell, I’m not a people person. I’m an introvert of the highest order. I like my space and time to be my own. I don’t like to share them with (m)any people. Only m. And the cats. I was feeling a little stifled at home and ever so slightly claustrophobic. So I went on a little trip home to see the family. Generally by day 2 or 3 I’m ready to go back, but this time, it was different. I didn’t want to come back. Since I’ve returned I’ve been blah, like something is missing. I can’t quite put a finger on what it is, but I know that something has changed.
Hello world! I’ve been in state of bleurgh for the past month or so… after the nostalgia from the vacation wore off somewhat I got kinda sick and was in feverish delirium and super fatigued. But I’m back. Or trying to be! The internet is sucky these days so it doesn’t let me upload pictures and takes ages for things to load… grr! I distract myself with work and other things. I’m thinking of starting up some stuff to keep myself busy. Maybe a website to sell through or something. Growing up is hard. Life is mad. People change. Expectations change. WE change. What we want changes and what we think we could handle or put up with changes too. But alas, we all have to do it…
“One of the greatest tragedies of life,” said K. L. Toth, “is to lose your own sense of self and accept the version of you that is expected by everyone else.” Unfortunately, I often think I myself have fallen victim to this tragedy. It’s sad how we change our lives, our character, our personality, even our looks to please others; sometimes consciously, but often subconsciously. Even though you yearn to be with someone who accepts you, “as you are,” it is hard – I’d say impossible – to find him/her in actuality. We’re slowly moulded, like rocks being eroded by the wind, as a closer reflection of our partners, families and maybe even friends or colleagues. Anyone who has any impact or bearing on our lives. Those we depend on. And it’s not like we don’t do the same. We also crave those around us to be more of this or less of that. To give up a certain habit we consider vile or take up a hobby more to our liking.
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Today I’m having a bit of a sick day, but I’m at work cos I’d rather be here than at home. My head is exploding amongst other things but still, here I sit. I stuck around also cos I thought I was feeling better, but turns out my brain is fuzzy and feels like it’s full of static noise. When I close my eyes (or even blink for that matter I get a faint feeling, as if I’m about to pass out). There’s a slow stupor coming over me and I crave my bed. Not long now. Just an hour before I can leave, maybe two before I get home and crawl into bed for some respite. The cats will attack me for love and cuddles and in that I may just fall asleep; just a little.
Still a little dazed and missing the carefree days I’ve left behind, but trying to get back on track with the worldly routine that is my life! The pace doesn’t slow for a second and you just kind of have to hit the ground running… helps you adjust, I guess, but it’s exhausting! Have some random quotes…
I have the bug. I’ve been infected by wanderlust! After this trip I kinda wanna just take a year (or five) off and travel from here to there, exploring, seeing, smelling, drawing… not knowing what day or time it is…
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